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Showing posts from November, 2013

unbalanced

I am in a grieving process. Not for the death of someone, but for the death of something. Not for the death of a friend, but for the death of a friendship that never was. I've heard the analogies of relationship and how it works. The progressive waves of circles that start with my closest, tightest circle of people in my life and continues outward to the mere acquaintances. And I get it, really I do. I have a group of people in my life that range from those that I would die for to those that I only communicate with on social media. Not everyone gets to be in that first, intimate sphere. or even in the first few. I get it. But there should be a balance, an evening-out of sorts, between my placement of them and their placement of me.
"A friendship is like a seesaw. It takes two people, and each needs to give and take a little to balance out the ride."Jinhee Junis
And I just can't do it anymore. I can't keep placing them in my closest loops, while I'm on their ou…

idols

You shall make for yourselves no idols and erect no carved images or pillars, and you shall not place figured stones in your land, to worship at them; for I am the Lord your God. Leviticus 26:1 


"...anything short of a full on relationship with the living God can be idol worship."

As I've pondered on this, I've realized that I've set up a few idols that are taking the place of God, man being one. I know when God is telling me to say something, do something, head in a certain direction. I know His whisper in my ear, His nudge of my spirit, His leading. I've even experienced hearing Him audibly. I know Him and He knows me. My struggle is do I know who I am? Do I trust that He created me, fashioned me for a purpose, and that all I need is to walk in that? At this point, it would be a lie to say yes. Because if I did, I wouldn't need the approval of others, the constant reassurance that I am indeed headed down the correct path, that I am being a "go…