Jesus said, "'Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence.' This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: 'Love others as well as you love yourself.' These two commands are pegs; everything in God's Law and the Prophets hangs from them." Matthew 22:37-40
Love has always been a big deal for me. If I have nothing left at the end of this journey, I sincerely hope that Love is still standing strong. Throughout my christian walk, the one constant that I have believed about Love is this: it is unwavering, unconditional, extravagant and indiscriminately lavished upon all. And that sounds perfect and good and exactly how a creator would feel about their creation, right?
So, you can imagine how one begins to question this sweeping love of god that is deep and wide, encompassing all in its vast path, with the love being preached over pulpits every week.
Love all ... but tell those of the LGBTQ community that they are a mistake.
Love all ... but allow racism to run rampant in the pews.
Love all ... but keep your women quiet and submissive as the lesser sex.
Love all ... but make your circles exclusive.
Love all ... but refuse to take small safety measures that honor the health of others.
Love all ... but ignore the poor, the needy, the hungry and the homeless.
For every time that I heard a "love all" and then witnessed the "but" playing out before me, I questioned. A little piece of me shrank back. A bigger piece of me cried out. Love isn't supposed to have a "but" attached.
and if it does, if you are going to quote his words and justify your bigotry and twist his book and claim that you are closer to him than I am, therefore smarter and better about how you portray his love...
do I really want to be a part of that love?
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you can read my other deconstruction moments here
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My deconstruction has no time frame, no ending in sight (yet), no right or wrong way to process, and no predestined landing spot. It is what it is, and I am allowing it to flow naturally for me while enjoying the ride.
Please do not offer me words that minimize the actions of others. ('god didn't hurt you, people did' type of statements) That is an example of how we allow The Church to shirk responsibility for its part in wronging others.
Love calls out injustices. Love calls for accountability. Love asks each one of us to own our mistakes while diligently being better in the following moments.
I have never given up on Love, and She doesn't give up on me.
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